Friday, June 5, 2009

Doing nothing

How liberating it is to just 'be' and do nothing... Be it in the confines of your own dwelling or out there in the open. Home ? When everyone else is gone for work, you shut the door and sit down with the thought that the next few hours belong to you and your thoughts can take a flight to wherever it wants to, like the feathered creatures. I love to watch that pretty two legged, green coloured, red beaked, 'being' called the parrot that I witness during summer- diligently chewing some part of the delicate fir tree, on which it is perched upon, clasping it in its claws and standing on one leg. This goes on for hours with its head moving tick-tock, side ways and down and occasionally the innocent looking tiny black eye balls meet me and I wonder could we be possibly connected?. Then its like a treasure hunt to spot two to three of the species, hidden behind the delicate needle like leaves, beautifully camouflaged. Suddenly a whole new world sets in once the eyes become expert in spotting few more movements and various other animal shapes. The squirrel is a permanent sight, always on the move and I sigh...What are you busy with little creature ?
Gazing at the greens for hours together is a panacea for the soul, with the cool morning breeze taking you in completely. And oh ! to get immersed in a book of your choice or the favorite daily, without having to worry about time, being in a flow with the self, like a plane on an autopilot. Years back I remember, it was scary to be with myself, when all of a sudden life threw me in a small place with little company and no source of books except for the newspaper which would come when the express train arrived from Mumbai. Not now. Learnt to be at peace with the 'self'. Used the sixth sense to know, to understand it. Heard somewhere 'God doesn't make junk'. Cancelled all the then prevailing thoughts 'to be perfect' and affirmed 'Its o.k. to be me' with the follies as well. Someone said 'If you would become perfect, then the place is not Earth, God would want you soon in the heaven'. You have to be comfortable with who you are. And until then, its a constant strife. Has to be.
And by the riverside ? sea shore ? on a long drive ? in a resort ? Not answerable to anyone is a luxury, so the need for inertness in between life's pell mell. Getting lost somewhere...to someone, handing over self by one's own will...doing nothing, in a no man's land.

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